These days, it seems like fewer and fewer young Christian men are getting married (or even dating, as far as I can tell), and the average marriage age is on the rise. Single guys (very few that I have known are worthy of the title of "men") are putting off marriage at an alarming rate in order to instead pursue education, careers, and just plain goofing off. Meanwhile their eventual mates are put in an unnatural position of having to provide for themselves, when God never intended for this to be the case.
These "man-boys" are waiting until they've had their fill of carefree, single life, until they're past they're prime and set in their ways, to seek out the "wife of their youth". What they don't realize is just how arrogant this proves them to be: they expect us women to "look like Angelina Jolie, with the morals of Mother Theresa," and yet we are left to just take whatever we can get for fear of becoming an old maid. They avoid commitment like the plague, excusing their cowardice with statements like these: "I need to be 100% sure;" "I gotta 'feel it;'" and even the ultimately chauvinistic "What if someone better-looking comes along?"
Let me ask you something, Christian: Were you 100% sure when you first gave your life to Christ? I don't think so! Or do you think your parents always "felt like" not killing you in your teens, or that they let you live out of sacrificial love for you, regardless of their emotions (which are chemically based, mind you)? Oh, and guess what: There will always be someone better looking! Since when has a successfully God-honoring marriage EVER been based on the outward appearance? (Please don't forget that we have eyes too.)
The bottom line is this: If you have a desire for the opposite sex, it is God's will for you to marry! (1st Corinthians 7:9) Because, guess what: marriage solves most of the sexual temptation that plagues us right and left in this world and within our own sinful hearts!
"When you get married... your sex life with your spouse will cause you to seek God in a deeper way, and in a more profound way, and even in a more passionate way.... In marriage, as we fulfill each other sexually, it will free us up to hear from God in a deeper way."
Pastor Ed talked about the new depths that your prayer life can reach when you are sexually fulfilled in marriage because when you're satisfied, you won't be all distracted when you're trying to pray; this reminds me as well of hunger: when I am hungry, I become very distracted from whatever I am doing, and find my thoughts turning toward food constantly until I am able to eat. Then once I'm satisfied, my mind becomes clear once again and I am able to focus completely on the task at hand. And though my own thoughts have not been straying in a sexual direction, I have noticed that the past few months have been incredibly frustrating for me with my own prayer life and worship because I find myself constantly thinking about someone in particular. (And if you think that either you can guess, or that I am going to tell you whom, you need to go take your meds because you are out of your mind. ...Let's just say that all of my trains of thought, no matter if they carry cargo or passengers, must run through the same depot. ^^;;) Back to my original topic now...
Other problems solved by marriage include laziness and selfishness, as you strive to obey the Scriptures and be a godly husband. Let's face it, guys: The greatest sermon you will ever preach is in your marriage! Ephesians 5:22-33 makes it very clear that marriage is meant to be a picture of the Gospel of Jesus Christ and His Bride, the Church. In order for you men to lead your wives in following Christ, you must exemplify Him in your own life, following after Him with every fiber of your being!
Please note, however, that I am not saying that this problem is one-sided; we women are not innocent victims! On behalf of my half of the family of God, men, I sincerely apologize for not striving to be the godly women that godly men deserve and need as helpmeets! We have neglected our bodies, the Temple of the Holy Spirit of God, by stuffing our emotions down our throats and lazily avoiding exercise; we have not been the pure and chaste women we should be, partying and clubbing with our friends; we have told you with our lips that we want to be pure, but with our clothing that we do not; we have put our own education and careers above developing those skills so vital to being a good homemaker for you, a good mother for your children; we have ourselves chauvinistically blamed all of our relational woes on you while doing nothing to ensure that we are worthy of the men we so long for.
Ladies, we also must rise up to be those women that the Scriptures declare are to "be praised" (Proverbs 31:10-31; Titus 2:4-5; 1 Timothy 2:9)!
But men, it is your duty to initiate the relationship, to lead the woman in following Christ, and to earn her respect for you as her leader. In those cases where the woman feels she must take charge and initiates the relationship, there will always be a measure of insecurity that she wasn't good enough to be pursued. Things just have a tendency to go badly when the man does not lead.
And for those of us who find ourselves twitterpated (at least seemingly) without return but who refuse to wreck their chances by taking matters in their own hands, I humbly suggest that you take more chances--ask us out. Don't play around, but diligently seek out a woman who can be a good helpmate for you, a supportive wife and loving mother, and don't wait until you're "sure". In my opinion (for what little it's worth), as long as God is being glorified and the devil is denied a foothold, it is in God's will. Don't over-think it, just follow the leading of the Holy Spirit and walk according to the Scriptures, and you cannot fail to please the Lord.
"See then that you walk circumspectly, not as fools but as wise, redeeming the time, because the days are evil." --Ephesians 5:16-17
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