Goodbye, teenage years...

Well, yesterday was my twentieth birthday, and a pretty swell one at that. After so many fitful and tumultuous days prior, it was peculiar and very welcome to have a day where even the unexpected inconvenience of a blown tire and subsequently mediocre sushi were not wholly unpleasant. I owe my gratitude to God for that wonderful birthday gift, to be sure.

I'm a little irked with my current loss for words to properly convey that which I had planned to express here, so I think I shall have to continue this post at a later time. Please accept my apologies, and enjoy this little "teaser" post as well as you can, looking forward to a soon appendage to it.

Prayer Request

I don't know if anybody will actually read this before this post becomes irrelevant, but if you do, would you please pray for my dad and brothers and their three traveling companions? They are in the Arizona mountains, on the road coming home from Oklahoma, and they are caught in a blizzard so bad that even the snowplow is stuck. The snow is coming down several inches per hour, and they are stuck in their rented minivan waiting for the roads to clear. Please pray for their speedy and safe return, and also for the other stranded motorists's safety as well.

Thank you all so much!

Erin

UPDATE: Praise be to God! Within an hour of posting this, God provided a way for the snowplow to make a way out, and Dad, etc. were able to get out of the mountains safely, and arrive home on time that night! Thank you all for praying, and please forgive me for not posting this update sooner! (^_^;)

Homecoming

Just what is it about knowing that I should blog regularly makes it seem like such a drag, and sucks all the creativity out of me at the mere thought of actually doing so? What is it with the way my thoughts reassemble themselves all poetically once I finally do? And what do I type now that I've completely lost my train of thought? Hmmm...

Ah! I've got it: camp. Or more specifically, my homecoming.

I'd been deeply involved in my church's high school ministry since I was a freshman back in... was it 2002?--up until I graduated in 2005, going to the high school study on Wednesday nights and a sort of spin-off house fellowship led by one of the youth leaders on Tuesdays, singing in the fledgling Worship Revolution Choir, going street witnessing with the SWAT Team on Friday nights, and attending Sunday night services with my friends (and, of course, with my mom, being unable to drive myself). Me and my proclivity for developing crushes on people bound to break my heart and never know it had gotten me pretty depressed and was probably a main contributing factor in causing me to pull away from my friends, none of whom I saw outside of church, and before I realized what had happened I had become completely separated from that whole ministry, not even attending on Sunday nights, and spending Wednesdays in the main Sanctuary with my parents. I stopped attending on Tuesday nights as well after becoming fed up with the people attending completely ignoring me, and descending further into my hermitage.

For two very blurry years I spent a good deal of my time volunteering in the church's evangelistic outreach Office of previous mention (whether or not any of those posts survived the recent freak spontaneous deletion is anyone's guess), during which time I learned a very hard lesson in the importance of guarding my heart against those whose personalities seem taylor-made for mine but whose spiritual priorities were ambiguous at best. Because of the crushing loss that resulted I spent much of this last summer in debilitating nausea and indigestion, having stuffed my emotions deep inside rather than face the harsh reality of the duplicitous nature of the former object of my affections and my own failure in being so very foolishly deceived.

It took me several months to recover emotionally, but after a few months I returned to Sunday night Bible study, driving my brothers as my "excuse" to myself, and allowed the Lord to really minister to me there, reconnecting myself with some family friends and relearning how to interact with my peers. Finally, one sunny Sunday afternoon late in the year I suddenly realized that I truly had moved on. I no longer felt the desperation of still being single at nineteen with no prospects, and discovered a divine peace in my heart about my future. I distinctly felt like I had been through a winter season in my walk with Jesus and was coming into spring. I even resumed attending the Tuesday study in December, ready to try once more to connect with my brothers and sisters in the Lord, though still a little unsure of their reception of the fundamentally changed me.

So early this year, after several weeks of prayer and seeking the Lord, I talked to my youth pastor about getting involved as a camp co-counselor again. It had been two full years since my first camp as a leader, and that time I'd had to leave early due to my maternal grandfather's unexpected departure for Heaven. While I was preparing for camp and attending the pre-camp leadership meetings I felt the Lord might be calling me to continue and expand my pursuit of Christian fellowship with people my own age, so I began attending the college and career group on Friday nights, and opening myself more and more to the godly people I found myself surrounded by, who have graciously reached out to me like I can barely recall anyone doing before.

Once I got up to camp the weekend before last, I realized the incredible opportunity before me once more to pour my heart into the young girls in the church and comfort them with the comfort I have received from the Lord Jesus Christ, rediscovering a passion for the youth in my own heart, long ago forgotten. And as the Lord ministered to me at camp, and used me to minister to the girls in my charge, I felt Him tugging at my heart to get more involved in the high school ministry.

My mother had been struggling with whether or not to remain in the women's Bible study on Wednesday mornings, and finally received such clear confirmation from the Lord that she (and I) dropped out. I immediately felt the Lord's peace about it, as I wasn't really growing in it, and leaving my study group in the morning allowed Mom and me to get enough sleep to be able to make sure my brothers, who are both in high school, were able to attend Wednesday nights. This was especially significant for me since Tuesday night's studies keep me up pretty late (especially when I do things like this at times like this---yikes!), and I have been seeing so much more spiritual growth in my life since I started coming again.

So finally this Sunday night I was able to talk to the youth pastor's amazing wife before study about getting more involved in the high school ministry on Wednesday nights, and was met with eager approval (I really love this lady--she's just so sweet and godly!!) and advice. And last night, I was back in ministry, to the delight of a couple of my young friends, and to my own grea blessing. I am currently looking forward to continuing to deepen my involvement in the ministry and am met with a deep-seated peace and joy, and a feeling of coming home. No fear or trepidation hold me back now, but faith and hope sustain and propel me in this race against time for men's souls.

I am home.

Oops! Missing posts!

Somebody has hacked into my blog and deleted some of my posts, a couple of which I have been able to recover (though I had to make an educated guess on the dates). Sorry for the mix-up! It won't happen again.

Promised Pillow

I kid you not, I did not plan a single thing before making this pillow. I just started cutting and pinning and sewing. No sketches, just a general idea of what I wanted which continually evolved throughout the creation process (no puns were harmed in the making of this blog).

Here's my pillow next to the pincushion I knit for myself last year or the year before and the Hello Kitty sewing machine I got for Christmas from my brothers. I love them to distraction. And I really hate the red color on my bedroom walls. I am waiting for the weather to cooperate so I can paint it the color the Pacific turns in just the right summer conditions, at which point I will redecorate with my pretty Simply Shabby Chic duvet (and shams, I think?), this adorable little accent pillow (and hopefully some new friends for it soon), the "Sweetest, Softest Nap Blanket and Lambie (pillow) on Earth" (from Bath & Body Works) which I also received for Christmas, from Mom, and pink sheets yet to be purchased.  I will also be repainting all my furniture ivory and sanding the edges for that coastal Shabby Chic look I love so much but can't afford (Can't you drop your prices a little, Rachel Ashwell?)

Here's the front:

And the back:

Close-up of front:

 

Up and Up

So, what have I actually accomplished since my last post?

1. I frogged my sweater fronts down to the beginning of the neck and have started to knit them up again the right way (albeit slowly), both on the same circular needle to avoid the "Sweaterfront" variation of Second Sock Syndrome;

2. I finalized my collar pattern (or so I recall);

3-5. These are useless to start until the sweater is actually finished, so I haven't bothered;

6-7. I decided to start spending some alone time with God and my guitar, so there's another accomplishment;

8. Just 1500 envelopes left, and my gym dues just came in yesterday, but I may have a new job looming on the horizon (praise God!);

9. Camp meeting was last night, and there's another meeting for the girls tonight, and I'm so excited!!

10. Mom has decided I have enough underwear, seeing as I "can only wear one pair at a time," so that's that;

11. $5 for 8oz. of my signature fragrance is pretty sweet: I--I mean, Mom saved $7;

12. The new Guitar Hero III controller actually works (what a concept);

13. PacSun just ran out of Zach's size belt in that style (every store all at one, I kid you not), but he found one he really liked instead (for the same price! Isn't God good?), so it's cool;

14. Vitamin levels are looking good;

15. Mom wasn't in the mood to buy me extra supplements that weren't essential (and by the time I found them it was too late anyway), so no glutamine;

16. Lunch was smashing for two Wednesdays in a row (though the second was eaten on the way home from study as I wasn't needed in the Office);

17. Both Bible studies were finished (the important parts, anyway), though the second was finished at study;

18. Found out online that I just needed to loosen the screw on the bobbin case, so my tension problem's fixed;

19. Calibration is for wimps! Who needs accuracy anyway?

20. I made my discipleship calls a week late, and I have some more to make by tomorrow;

21. I'm still working on the whole "bedtime" thing, but I'm getting better;

22. Made that training appointment and a few others;

23. Threw out some bad stuff, and this morning I found some rice from the ninth in the back of the fridge that needs to be thrown out;

24. Used up my iTunes gift card but I'm waiting for some yarn to come back in stock at Knit Picks;

25.  Cam up with new to-dos and such, blah, blah, blah.

The important thing is, I actually got some stuff done, and more besides! For example, I have a pillow ready to be sewed that took me all day Tuesday to cut and arrange (you'll see why when you see the pictures of the finished product). I also knit and unraveled a rainbow-colored beret --twice. I have returned the yarn to its former skein form, complete with reattached label. I'll try to find another pattern for it someday, but it just wasn't enough for a beret. Oh well.

So that's all for now; I'm too tired to think right now and Mom promised to knit.

And knit she surely shall.

To-Do Blues

To Do:

1. Unravel both sweater fronts to top of button band, put band stitches on holder, reknit the rest (with slight shaping modifications).
2. Make final adjustments to collar pattern and knit the collar. Don't forget to factor in the white trim!
3. Weave in all loose ends.
4. Block and assemble. Take pictures for blog.
5. Redraw charts and write out pattern. Prepare Sailor Sweater pattern for submission.
6. File nails short enough to play my guitar again.
7. Practice playing my guitar.
8. Stuff 9,000 envelopes to pay off bills. Try not to think about the gym dues coming in later this month.
9. Prepare for High School Winter Camp '08. Make a list, check it twice, don't forget organic snacks for the girls in my cabin. And extra underwear.
10. Buy said skivvies.
11. Buy more body lotion at Bath & Body Works.
12. Exchange Zach and Nate's Guitar Hero III controller at Best Buy.
13. Exchange Zach's belt for the next size up at PacSun.
14. Buy more coral calcium and fücothin at Vitamin Shoppe. Make sure everything else is well-stocked before you go.
15. Oh, and pick up some glutamine while you're there.
16. Pack lunch tonight for between bible study and volunteer work at church tomorrow morning/afternoon.
17. Finish Bible study before it starts tomorrow morning.
18. Call Janome and find out how to fix bobbin/thread tension on Hello Kitty sewing machine I got for Christmas. If they aren't helpful, try a Jo-Ann store. Or Nancy your next-door neighbor.
19. Find a composite track and calibrate Nike+ sensor so it stops grossly overestimating your achievements. Try not to be too disappointed with the truth.
20. Make discipleship follow-up calls later this week.
21. Start going to bed the night before the morning on which you plan to awaken.
22. Get ready for personal training session Monday morning at 0830 hours.
23. Check kitchen and medicine cabinet for products of questionable viability and throw out anything that's expired. Look surprised when all of the boys' horribly unhealthy foods magically disappear around the same time. ("Who, me?")
    
24. Figure out what you're getting with your $15 gift card for iTunes and your $40 gift certificate for Knit Picks. Have fun spending other people's money again. (^_~)
25. Try to remember anything else I may have forgotten. Sigh.